Monday, September 21, 2009


UNBELIEVABLE! From Tight 26 to tight 20 in ONE MONTH!!
OK, I even surprised myself. MAN OH MAN! Just two days ago in my blog, I said that my goal was to be in my size 20 jeans by my birthday, which is a month away from tomorrow. Well, what am I sitting here wearing while blogging? You guessed it, my size 20 jeans, same style as the size 26's that I wore just 4 weeks ago. Walmart, JMS Jeans, Stretch. They are on. They are buttoned. They are zipped. And I am still breathing while I sit on the couch and blog.


You don't know how happy this makes me. As I said before, I refuse to put happiness on the shelf "until" I get to goal. My life is being lived right now, right in front of me, BY me. I am not a spectator, and I am not going to skulk around feeling sorry for myself. I'm not putting my happiness on hold waiting for that "someday" when I wake up at goal.

I am happy. I am ecstatic. I am elated. Yeah, I'm still in the 240's. But I am NOT miserable, like I was on the way up. Because I am actively DOING something about it. And it's working. Again!

So I'm doing the happy dance. 4 weeks and 1 day into the program, I have lost 19 lbs, I have lost 6.5 inches off my waist, and I am wearing size 20 jeans when I started at size 26.

Hallelujah! Have a great day, y'all! I know I will.
Posted Monday, Sep 21, 2009 12:56 PM by goalbysummer | 8 Comments [Edit Post]


Baby Steps and Primary Colors
The baby steps describes my exercise session this evening. We live in a cool little neighborhood which is sort of agricultural themed with a running trail and parks. It's called "Agritopia" and if you google it you can see the house styles. It's pretty cool, and we have an award winning coffee shop in the neighborhood, as well as an awesome organic grill.

But I digress. First, glancing briefly back and trying not to get discouraged doing it, I ran a half-marathon on September 30th 2007. It is now almost exactly 2 years later. And I am 120 lbs heavier.

But we all have to start (or re-start) somewhere. And I put on my running shoes, went outside, and ran for 1 minute. Then I walked a minute. Then I ran a minute. I did this until I had run for 5 minutes, at one minute intervals.

One year and 4 months from now, I will be running the Rock and Roll PF Chang's Marathon in Scottsdale. I will mark the day that I could only run for 5 minutes. In one minute intervals. And four months from now I will be walking the Half Marathon.

Now, the primary colors. Body, Soul, Spirit. The primary colors in my Avatar signify that for me. If we are neglecting even one of these aspects, we are neglecting taking care of ourselves. So here goes.

And here is to being sore in the morning.
Posted Sunday, Sep 20, 2009 10:21 PM by goalbysummer | 6 Comments [Edit Post]


Don't Read if Clothing Doesn't Interest You..
Took a walk into my closet today to see what I could see. It is comprised mostly of my goal clothing. I love goal clothing, and was actually wearing said clothing in Sept of 2007, well, when I was at goal!

Now it motivates me to think about being able to wear those beautiful items again.

We don't have a ton of cash. But I have compiled, through strategic sales through the years, an impressive, and I mean IMPRESSIVE stash of name-brand clothing.

One of my biggest thrills was walking into a Ralph Lauren Polo Clothing Store and finding a pair of 4-P Capri Jeans right off the rack...and them fitting.

I can only dream of being in them again, but mark my words, it will happen. And my cute and sexy little tops? Ann Taylor Loft, Banana Republic, White House/Black Market, INC., New York and Co, etc etc.

I just bought 2 dresses at goodwill last week. One was a princess empress-cut size 2 light blue rayon short sleeved floor length dress, and the other was a bright spring green jersey-tank-type heavy rayon tube dress from Jones and Co in a Small. I can't wait to be wearing those someday. Well, I can wait, and I will wait.

The journey, not just the results, is the key. And I choose not to be miserable "until" I get to goal, I choose to rejoice in every pound lost and in every size dropped. My life is now. It is not then. It is now.

But then WILL come. =)
Posted Sunday, Sep 20, 2009 6:09 PM by goalbysummer | 3 Comments [Edit Post]


Official Week Four Weigh-in:
18 pounds gone forever from this bod.


I hope to settle into a groove of 3 lbs/week weight loss now that the first month is over. I'll tell you what, that week 4 plateau was disheartening, but the fact that I pushed through it without allowing it to throw me off my game has convinced me beyond a doubt that I am well on my way back into my size 2-P (for Petite) Ann Taylor Gray Dress Slacks.

I was able to wear those puppies once. In the dressing room of Ann Taylor, when I decided to buy them at goal in September of 2007. I bought them, I took them home, I found out I was pregnant and they never fit again.

Flash forward to now, sitting in size 22 jeans (which were 26 jeans 4 weeks ago...and tight 26's at that) and blogging about my success.

It is me time. It is go time.

A friend just called to tell me she is running in the PF Chang's Half Marathon in January, and do I want to do it with her? I told her that I would love to WALK it, and we can meet up before and after. SO FUN. The last 1/2 marathon I did was September of 2007, the Boulder Backroads Marathon and I LOVED it! I ended up running for 11 miles and walking the last 2.3 miles, but I finished.

I actually hope to do the whole marathon in January of 11. That is my goal. Always need a goal, or I go stagnant.

I guess that would make me a "goal-oriented" person. Hence my name, goalbysummer.

I hope to be out of the obese and into the overweight catagory by this summer. And then I hope to be in the normal weight category at the END of next summer. Here's to me!
Posted Sunday, Sep 20, 2009 4:55 PM by goalbysummer | 3 Comments [Edit Post]


Breaking through the Plateau...
This morning I broke through my plateau of 251...

My weigh in? was 250.5, and I'll TAKE IT!

Doing some extra work today to break through to the 240's, hopefully by tomorrow! My plateau lasted a whole week! My entire week four. It was depressing, but never once did I consider letting it throw me off my weight-loss goals. So, we motor through the plateau trials of our onward and downward journey. I will get those 20's in in the next few weeks! I'm sure of it! By my birthday, Oct 22, I want to be OUT of size 22 and INTO size 20.

I am so tired of my jiggles. I am so tired of (again) being scrutinized for everything I have in my shopping cart. Thankfully, I don't feel any condemnation coming from people who give my basket a once-over, because HA HA, I always have lean meats, lots of fresh fruit and veggies, and milk and yogurts for Julian in my basket. So they probably scratch their heads in wonderment...but that's ok!

In about 6 more months, I will blend in to the average shopper, not be the heaviest one in the Whole Foods Market or Sprouts.

Take care!
Posted Saturday, Sep 19, 2009 9:29 PM by goalbysummer | 4 Comments [Edit Post]


Cinnamon Pretzels Oh My.
I wonder if we would lose weight having the cinnamon pretzels for every meal? Sheesh they are deeelish.

Still on my "week four plateau" which is a bummer but oh well, drinking my water and getting on with my day.
Posted Friday, Sep 18, 2009 4:34 PM by goalbysummer | 5 Comments [Edit Post]


Doing Well, On Plan
I forgot if it's day 25 or day 26...but I'm on plan and doing well today!

Posted Thursday, Sep 17, 2009 4:14 PM by goalbysummer | 2 Comments [Edit Post]


I'll Tell You What Makes Medifast So Difficult for Some....
I am on my second time around because I did not transition/maintain.

My initial Medifast stint took my from 266 to 130 in 14 months. That is -136 lbs in 14 months.

As far as I'm concerned, the great debate of "to cheat or not to cheat" is a self-deceiving one. Medifast is an epic struggle for many because they are looking at every temptation as a possible option that they have to say no to.

My success was derived by attempting 100% at all costs. When you look at off-program food as even an OPTION, then you actively have to CHOOSE not to have it, multiple times per day. Each of those decisions is hard, and each of those decisions is exhausting and only increases your inner voice that is screaming "it's not fair I have to do this". It erodes your resolve.

However, if you look at Medifast as ONE choice, a choice that you already MADE to be 100% on the program, then those daily "temptations" actually go away. They go away because in your mind it is not even a possibility that you will have them. It removes the daily, sometimes hourly decision making process and as a result you don't constantly feel deprived because you aren't constantly reminding yourself that you "can't" have this or that because you have to choose not to every time you are confronted with it.

I guess what I am trying to say, is that when I am successful it is because I made the CHOICE, at the beginning, the one CHOICE that I was going to stick to Medifast no matter what. To me, there is no "choosing" to go off program because my CHOICE is already made.

I only begin to struggle when I lose sight of the initial choice, and start thinking that I have to make 10 choices a day.....the odds of making a wrong choice when I have 10 to make today is high. Whereas the fact that I made the ONE choice to stick to MF 100% give me pretty good odds that I won't falter.

I've been on plan 100% since I began MF for the second and last time, 3 1/2 weeks ago. And it is NOT hard. Because my choice has been made and I'm done entertaining "how" I might be able to have a little of this or a little of that and "when" is it justifiable to go off plan and "why" should I NOT have a little piece of this and "with what" shall I eat off plan with....and "is it worth it" to deny myself day in and day out and "I've been so good I deserve it" as if me being "good" on a diet for X amount of days or weeks puts me in a position where I "deserve" to cheat and keep myself fat for that much longer.

Anyway, the bottom line is those who are committed to remaining 100% are committed to their success. Those who are not are making it harder for themselves, and maybe they will succeed and maybe they will not. For me there is no maybe. My choice is made. How about yours?

Posted Wednesday, Sep 16, 2009 4:09 PM by goalbysummer | 19 Comments [Edit Post]


At Week Four Plateau
Yup, that not-so-mythological four week plateau. I'm there. But my clothes are fitting looser, so I am not discouraged. My body is shape-shifting now. I will focus on that.

Posted Wednesday, Sep 16, 2009 11:09 AM by goalbysummer | 3 Comments [Edit Post]


Day 24 almost done.
Day 24 is almost done. A few more days and I will have solidified this "new" lifestyle as a habit. Again! =)

I was grieving today for the fact that I let myself gain weight again. Looking back, and being so strongly committed to the program, I wonder why in the world I couldn't pull it together 2 years ago in the fall of 2007 and just do the work? I mean I know in my heart that I was not at a point in my life to focus on the program, but then my head says "well why not?"

If I were me responding to a blog I may have written 2 years ago, I would have told me to pull it together, that I needed to do it for my son and my husband and ultimately for myself. I would have told me that my health is much more important than making excuses for gaining weight. I would have slapped me around a little bit.

Oh, isn't it enlightening, armchair-quarterbacking our own lives? I guess we all have regrets in our life. I am praying that I can get the weight off again, I am PLANNING on getting it off again, and I have a strategy to do so. But meanwhile, I grieve a little that I can't wear even my size 20 jeans yet. Perhaps I enjoy being hard on myself.

I was pondering my youth, and my growing up with an overweight mother, and a size 2 elder sister. Society is hard, classmates are hard, people in general are hard on a child who is obese. It was always communicated to me in nonverbal ways that "if only I were thin". "If only I were like my sister". "If only." It as as if somehow I would be "enough" or I would "matter" if only I didn't struggle with my weight.

I was in weight watchers in the 4th grade. My mom would pack my lunch every day, and since she wasn't a big "lunch-packer" I would end up with a can of smoked oysters and some cottage cheese for my protein, 6 saltine crackers, and some salsa and celery for my vegetable. OH BOY! Just the kind of lunch to allow me to go unnoticed.....NOT. Now I was the fat kid who brought freaky-weird lunches to school. I did, however, lose about 20 lbs. And for a 4th grader, I thought that was pretty good! But also sad.

I got poor grades in grades 1-3 because everyone had my sister before me, and when they saw me I'm SURE they made snap judgements that because I was overweight I was therefore lazy.

That changed in 4th grade, when we changed schools and my 4th grade teacher did not ever HAVE my sister in class. All of a sudden I was getting all A's. And it's not that I was doing anything differently.

I remained the "chunky" kid with the "chicken legs" through Junior High and High School, where my sis went on to be a cheerleader, and although I tried out every year I did not make it until my Senior year. That's when I made the cheer line.

It was that summer that I vowed to myself that I was NOT going to be the heaviest girl on the cheer line. The girl I inherited my uniform from had been "Moo-ed" at from the stands at football games during half-time. That was NOT going to be me.

So, in September of my Senior year, I began the Diet Center weight loss program. I lost 30 pounds. I was NOT booed at. I was wearing fun clothing. My sister had graduated. It was MY time.

I was able to maintain my weight into my first 2 years of college, with hard work and diligence. Then I went to Bible School in England.

At the Bible School in England, the girls gained weight, and they guys lost it. We ate cereal for breakfast, oily greasy meat stew on rice or potatoes for lunch, and ham and pineapple toasts for dinner. It was well-nigh impossible for me to get any lean proteins there, so I actually didn't eat very much except what few vegetables they served for the first 2 months, and I swam every day. I actually felt good, and was maintaining my weight there until I gave it all up one day. In one decision, I decided I was DONE struggling. I was DONE saying no to everything. So I began to indulge. Hob Nobs. Eat-Fests with my dormmates. Everything I had been missing for the first 2 months, I ate. And through the next 7 months, I gained 50 lbs.

Coming back home, I joined the Diet Center again. I lost about 40 lbs, which put me at the nice healthy weight of 122. Then I got married. I married a man a met at Bible School, a Canadian. We moved to Canada, to Winnipeg, and my wedding day was the last day I weighed 122 since then.

I steadily gained about 10 lbs per year for the next 14 years. In there somewhere was a stint of Body For Life, where I lost about 30 lbs, but promptly regained it.

Topping out at 266, I began Medifast in 2006. It worked so well for me, I was thrilled. in 14 months I lost almost 140 lbs, and then went through the "year of trials" I was referring to at the top. I made bad choices. I looked after everyone else's needs EXCEPT my own. Now I'm back. I've lost 16 lbs, and am on my way to 122.

My goal last time was 128. I have revised it to 122. And I will get there. And I will STAY there. It is a comittment I am making to myself. And guess what? I am SO worth it.

Posted Tuesday, Sep 15, 2009 10:05 PM by goalbysummer | 6 Comments [Edit Post]

DAY 23

Day 23
Day 23, and still going strong. Just made a fresh batch of spicy cabbage soup for my greens.

Yumm. Still going strong, still excited to lose the weight. I am stalled a bit, call it the 3-4 week plateau. But I know that my body is still changing, as are my habits and my mindset.

So on I go, eating every 2.5 hours, keeping my coffee and half and half consumption within acceptable levels (2 TBSP half and half per day), and knowing that it is only a matter of time. It is only a matter of time.








And, Lord willing, "time" I've got.

Posted Monday, Sep 14, 2009 4:36 PM by goalbysummer | 0 Comments [Edit Post]


Still On Plan....Moving in to day 23 tomorrow!
Yes indeed. Still on plan, moving in to day 23 tomorrow. I am hoping that weeks 4, 5, and 6 go as well as weeks 1, 2, and 3.

I've been doing very well. No slips. 100%. I am considering beginning some dedicated walking over the next week, to really take advantage of this increased energy I am feeling.

I just wanted to check in, because, knowing myself, I know that when I am not posting I am usually in to trouble, and I don't want my friends on MF worrying about me.

Posted Sunday, Sep 13, 2009 10:21 PM by goalbysummer | 3 Comments [Edit Post]


Yes, it happened without fanfare today, in the solitude and privacy of a Walmart dressing room cubicle. "WE NEED AN ASSOCIATE IN JEWELRY, AN ASSOCIATE IN JEWELRY" was blaring in the background, but I didn't care. It was one of my "moments" that I savored. The passing of the torch from one size to a smaller size. And my first victory this time around happened today.

My size 26 jeans, which were tight when I purchased them about 2 months ago, were falling off me as I entered the store. I made a beeline for the JMS department, and found size 22's and 24's. I got the 22's on, buttoned and zipped, so I didn't even try on the 24's.

Here I go, people! I am deflating. For anyone who wants to see the miracle of Medifast, look at my before and after pictures on my blog.

DID I GAIN ALL MY WEIGHT BACK....YES! But it was because I did NOT do transition and maintenance. So I am a posterchild for transition and maintenance.

I am ready to wear my 22's. Thankfully this is the last pair of jeans I will have to buy for awhile, because I still have my 20's, I still have my 18's, I still have my Levi's 517 style 16's, my Levi's 517 style 14's, my 12's, my 10's, my 8's, my 6's, my 4's, my 4P's, and my 2's.

Yes indeed. All in the same style. And I wore them ALL on medifast last time around. They are waiting in my closet. I am ready to wear them.

I went to Macy's last night before my movie, and bought a few ultra clearance items for my goal closet for next summer. When I am down, I am a Small-Petite, or Medium-Petite depending on the cut of the blouse. I bought about 8 super-cute tops, all between $7.00 and $15.00. I even got a beautiful "Lauren" 1/2 silk sporty-style sweater for $12.00 instead of $99!

I am a clothes horse. And now I have a few more adorable youthful fun and sporty tops in my closet, just waiting for me to get to goal!

Here's to all of us!

OK, on the guests we are having over "for dinner" tonight...

We are doing a BYOF! Yes! A Bring-Your-Own-Food! Since my husband and I are both on medifast, I DO NOT want to buy, stock, prepare, and keep the leftovers of anything that is not strictly On Plan. So, we will have our shakes, and they will have their burgers! After all, it is the relationship and the together-time that counts, not the eating of food!

so, I am down 16 lbs now, in 3 weeks. I have a feeling I will be hanging out at a size 22 for some time now, as I usually don't break into the 20's until I'm about 220. That is 30 lbs from now.

Happy Medifasting, you all! And remember, HOPE IS NOT A STRATEGY! What do I mean by that? Well, exactly this:

"I hope I can get down by Christmas."
"I hope I can stay on plan this weekend."
"I hope I don't screw this up"
"I hope I can get to goal"

Do these sound familiar? Well, the good news is that if you are ON Medifast, you have not survived on HOPE alone. You have created a PLAN of ACTION and CHOSEN to DO something about the hope you carry within you.

It is entirely up to YOU. Now that you are ON Medifast, do you have strategy for those tricky times? "I Hope I can stay on plan at the business dinner" is NOT a strategy. What is your strategy for staying on plan at the business dinner? It could be something like:

"I will order grilled chicken with a side of steamed vegetables, EVEN IF IT IS NOT LISTED ON THE MENU". Now THERE is a plan of action. When you get there, there is no guesswork, there is no nervousness. There is simply "I know it's not on the menu but I'd just like a grilled chicken breast and a side of steamed vegetables or else a small dinner salad with dressing on the side, no cheese, no croutons".

There! That was easy! That's a strategy.

Or how about the classic: "I don't want to offend the host, so I hope she doesn't ask me if I want a piece of dessert because I don't know what I'll say".

STRATEGY: "If the host asks me if I want some dessert, I will politely say "no thank you, I just don't have room for it!"

That is a true statement. And the host is not offended. Perfectly acceptable statement. You DON'T have room for it in your life. You have chosen that ahead of time. It's just a creative way of saying it.

Just some wonderings and ponderings.

Now let's all do this thing!
Posted Saturday, Sep 12, 2009 3:23 PM by goalbysummer | 10 Comments [Edit Post]


It's the subtle things....
Sometimes it's those things that you hardly even being up for a whole hour before you realize that your back did not hurt when you got out of bed this morning. I guess 15 lbs will do that!
Posted Wednesday, Sep 9, 2009 10:19 AM by goalbysummer | 5 Comments [Edit Post]


Week two stats:
Starting weight: 267
2 week weight: 253

and -20 inches when measuring:
chest, bust, torso, waist, abdomen, hips, buttocks, upper thigh, mid thigh, knee and calf.

I am psyched!
Posted Tuesday, Sep 8, 2009 10:53 PM by goalbysummer | 2 Comments [Edit Post]


Having a great time...losing weight!
I am finally starting to feel smaller. I love feeling smaller! In a few pounds I will be under 250, and that is awesome. Things are going well, hubby and I are grooving along. He is almost under 200 lbs, probably will be there in two weeks time.

He is getting excited about taking care of himself, as am I, and neither of us can believe we let ourselves get so out of control. But this is a new new season. And we are mutually encouraging each other instead of throwing each other under the bus by eating ice cream and chocolate together.

Bye for now!
Posted Monday, Sep 7, 2009 1:53 PM by goalbysummer | 5 Comments [Edit Post]


Official 2 week results = 14 lbs lost.
I know I said yesterday I had lost 12 lbs and 4 inches off my waist. But today was actually 2 weeks officially, and I was down another 2 lbs!

I started walking yesterday, and the extra activity pushed me right over the edge weight-loss wise! Yay!

See you tomorrow!
Posted Sunday, Sep 6, 2009 7:06 PM by goalbysummer | 4 Comments [Edit Post]


Down 12 lbs and lost 4 inches from my waist in 2 weeks!
What a great 2 weeks I have had. I think I'm ready to start walking! I lost 12 lbs, and 4 inches off my waist alone! My pants are definitely starting to feel looser. What an encouragement to finally be on the road "home" so to speak. The road back to the body that I know I am capable of.

In the last couple weeks I have accumulated some wonderful goal clothes to add to my current goal closet. size 4-6. I know I am a 2 in some things also, but until I actually get there I don't want to buy too many size 2 things because I don't want to be disappointed with how they fit once I'm THERE. But what I AM buying in 2 and 6 can stand to be a little loose and still look great.

This is all part of my certainty that I will get there. My faith in the program, and my faith in my ability to follow the program come any distraction that may be down this road. I WILL succeed. It is not a matter of "if". It's not even REALLY a matter of "when", because I have a window of time I can expect to be at goal in, and I intend to be there.

I still remember when I bought a size 8 dress from White House/Black Market that I had been looking at all winter....I bought it in April at a killer clearance sale and said "I'm going to wear that to Rachel's wedding in mid July". I think I was still a size 14 at the time. Guess what? I wore it. It looked awesome.

You read the blogs, you see the successes people have, and I know the tendency is to wonder "yes, but will it work for me?" The answer is YES!!! If you commit to follow the program, you will NOT BE DISAPPOINTED AGAIN. It is purely up to you.

Do people but the product, start the program, and fail? Sure, some do, but it is not because the program didn't work for them. They didn't work for their goal, their dream. Myself included, for the last 5 or 6 restarts last year. The failure was so fresh that I had lost ALL confidence in my ability to follow the program. Whether Medifast worked or not was never the issue with me. It was all whether I was willing to do the program.

So take heart, all ye who follow the program. You WILL see results.

For those of us with 100+ pounds to lose, I think the first 40 is kind of the hardest, because we aren't getting all the comments that start coming later on in our weight loss. The first time around for me I had 136 lbs to lose. After I had lost 40 pounds, people were still NOT noticing. I came to the conclusion not to be disheartened, because big is big. And 100 lbs overweight is not too discernable a difference to those who don't see me every day as 136 lbs overweight. They are just both, well, big.

So right now I am, well, I am 137 lbs away from my goal. And, well, big is big. I weigh 255 today, and probably not a whole lotta people are going to ask me if I've lost weight until I am under 200. So, that is 55 more pounds I've got to lose before people even start to notice. I know that any pictures that I take of myself between now and 200 lbs will just be huge disappointments to I'm not going to do it. Pictures still affect me. I don't see the difference in pictures until I reach 200 lbs, but I sure do feel the difference when I'm fitting into smaller and smaller sizes from now until then!

It's a journey, and I'm on it, and that is all that matters.

Happy Medifasting, everyone!
Posted Saturday, Sep 5, 2009 7:20 PM by goalbysummer | 0 Comments [Edit Post]


Just got a pair of Ann Taylor Curvy Fit jeans in a size 6
Yup. My Friday evenings are not spent going out to eat. For the price of a meal somewhere that I would have stressed over whether or not it was Medifast compliant (you can never really control how much oil they use in the process of cooking the meat...) I stayed on ebay and got myself a pair of jeans for $16.00 (free shipping).

Ann Taylor jeans, which I think are around $70 in the stores...for sure more than $50! Size 6. My waist was down to 28-29 last time I was at goal, so I figure these will be a comfy fit as I'm working to get the last 10-20 lbs off. (They have a waist of 34)

Of course that's about a year and a half away...but a girl can dream!

Today was a great day! I had to take some Pamprin due to the very inconvenient TOM, but I got through all my cravings beautifully! I am struggling with wanting coffee mid-day, and I do not like regular coffee without half and half...but I DO like espresso with 1/2 packet of splenda, so I splurged and got myself a cuisinart burr grinder at Costco that does super-fine grind for our espresso machine. Now I can have an afternoon shot of espresso as a pick-me-up without being tempted to have an extra splash of half and half.

Hubby has taken to reading my cookbooks at night, poor chap! That and what we call "food-por*" of the Food Network Channel. Seriously. Diners, Drive-ins and Dives is our favorite show. We get our big glass of ice water and settle in for 1/2 hour of torture. Ha!

No, not torture. It is "almost" as fun enjoying other people eating those things than eating them ourselves.

I am really looking forward to the time when I can start to (slowly) run again. I won't do it until I am under 200...but until then I can start to walk!

This is a rambling long post, but I tend to blog my thoughts, it helps me NOT be in the kitchen.

Take care, everyone!
Posted Friday, Sep 4, 2009 10:51 PM by goalbysummer | 2 Comments [Edit Post]


Day by Day, White Packet by White Packet...
Day by day. White packet by white packet. Line 'em up, one MF meal after another, with a Lean and Green thrown in once a day. Drink the water. Do it again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. See results.

Line 'em up, one MF meal after another, with a Lean and Green thrown in once a day. Drink the water. Do it again. And again. And again. And again. And again. And again. See results.

MF CAN get monotonous every once in awhile, but the results are anything BUT monotonous. And it is these results that keep me honest with myself. Is it exciting? No, the plan is not very exciting to me. Is it fun? No, the plan is not very fun to me. Is it easy? Yes. Does it work? Yes.

For me, Medifast doesn't have to be fun, exciting, inspiring, earth-shattering, interesting, or any of that. It is one quiet day after another, doing routine things to get my health and my life in order.

It is almost diametrically opposed to everything my little thrill-seeking impulsive heart is drawn to.

So I'm quietly working out my faith. My faith in the Lord, yes, and my faith in Medifast that this proven program works over the long haul.

It ain't sexy, but I will be when I'm done.
Posted Friday, Sep 4, 2009 2:54 PM by goalbysummer | 6 Comments [Edit Post]


I'm getting cold...must mean it's working!
Everyone's body responds differently to this diet, but one thing I've seen as a constant...that people get cold easier. I don't know if it is the increase in fat burning, or the decrease in "insulation" (read: Fat), that results in the outright feeling of being CHILLY!

I already took a hot bubbly bath, so I can't really do that again. I think I need one of those blankets with the arms in know, the ones that get made fun of!

Mmmmm....Birthday present for October maybe?

I'm doing great, had lean pork and salad for dinner tonight, and am still busy drinking all my water. Should be done with that soon.

Anyway, just checking in, nothing earth shattering to say.
Posted Tuesday, Sep 1, 2009 11:18 PM by goalbysummer | 4 Comments [Edit Post]


Great Day, Still With You all...
Broke through my end-of-first-week plateau, and am doing fine. Just checking in with y'all.

Had some unexpected lab results for Julian which have since resolved themselves, praise God. I am not ready for his transplanted kidney to fail. No way, no how. He's been doing so incredibly well for almost 16 months now, if something was going to happen it would have happened within the first year.


So, got through the last week with the stress of that, and not turning to comfort food. Yay me.

Take care!
Posted Monday, Aug 31, 2009 11:58 PM by goalbysummer | 7 Comments [Edit Post]


Sort of a response to the comments on my last post "My two cents" + more...
Thanks for all the comments...and in answer to question that was posed to me, is it really even worth it if there is a chance I'll gain it back that I say it is only worth it if the pain of being overweight (mentally and physically) is less bearable than the pain of learning to be self disciplined for the rest of your life. It's a choice. Obviously, I oscillated between the two and gained my weight back, trying to mask OTHER, unrelated pain which became more overwhelming than either of those pain options (don't my life sound like a bowl of cherries?---God is my strength and my comfort now, but I mistook food for God for about the last year and a half.....).

Now that season of my life is over, and being fat just hurts.

Being fat I just hurt all the time, in my body and in my heart. But in the losing, there are periods of great joy punctuating the long hard work of buckling down and losing the weight. It really isn't a case of "WHEN I get to my goal, THEN I'll be happy." I was actually elated once I dropped below 200, and all the way TO my goal! So there IS joy in the journey.

And I was so flattered when "PEOPLE" Magazine interviewed me for their "PEOPLE WHO LOST HALF THEIR SIZE" January 2008 issue. I didn't make the cut, but hey, I WAS considered! My new goal is to be featured in the "PEOPLE WHO LOST HALF THEIR SIZE...AND ONE WHO DID IT TWICE!" 2012 edition, (I Made up that title...but who knows!?) once I've lost my 149 lbs and been maintaining for a year. I want to show other people that they can do it. And not only the people who haven't yet done it once, but I also want to inspire the people who have done it, gained it back, and are sitting there thinking "why bother-I could never do it again-I'm obviously a failure". My heart hurts for such people.

But the only way for ME to get there in any time frame that means anything concrete to me, any time frame that I can actually wrap my mind around and say...."OK, 15 months..." is to do it 100%. The 100% AS WRITTEN food plan. I Do weigh every day, and actually I find that vital for me. But that is not a "cheat" in the food sense of the word. Do it 100% as written, and you will stay motivated enough to stick to it 100%.

Eat off plan? Have a drink? Your results will suffer and at some point you just won't make that next order. You'll drift off the boards. I'm not condemning, the Good Lord knows I have attempted restarts 5 or 6 times in the last year and a half. So I'm not condemning, I've BEEN THERE.

Anyway, I hope this helps someone! Ya gotta be CERTAIN you will get there, and the only way you can be CERTAIN is being 100%. Otherwise the variable is too great, and the possibility exists that you WON'T get there. For me, that ain't an option.

So, today I went to goodwill and found a CRAZY-BEAUTIFUL embroidered pair of jeans by CosJeans in a 4P, and a matching CRAZY medium shirt by Edista, total price for this goal outfit: $14.00. It actually looks like something RadiationGirlie would wear, and let's face it, she is my hero. I SO want to be like her!

Bear in mind, I'm less than 1 week into the LAST restart of my LIFE, currently sitting here in size 26 shorts and a Large really stretchy Talbots shirt which should actually be a 2 or 3XL.

But I am certain. I am 100% proof positive that right around new year 2011 or thereabouts I will be fitting in to those jeans. And I'll paste and copy this entry to inspire the people who have just started the Medifast Program at that time.

Have a great day, y'all!
Posted Sunday, Aug 30, 2009 9:26 PM by goalbysummer | 4 Comments [Edit Post]


My two cents....
The following are my opinons, and my opinions only:

I've been a no nonsense advocate from day one. And I've taken my share of heat from it. Did I play around on the diet on my way to my goal? VERY seldom, and when I did, I OWNED it and was appropriately rewarded with no weight loss for the week.

People say "oh, but you've got to learn how to eat moderately etc etc etc...." Then go find a plan where you can do that, like Weight Watchers.

THIS is a no-nonsense, no-foolin' around weight loss plan. I did not come here to learn how to eat moderately. I came here to lose weight. Eating moderately most of the time and eating what I wanted SOME of the time put 137 freaking pounds BACK on me once I was at my goal a couple years ago.

So, you want a poster child for moderate eating? Look at me, on my way back up. You want a poster child for Medifast success, in addition to success at maintenance? Look at Radiationgirlie. And even SHE, or anyone else who is currently maintaining, will probably tell you it is a struggle to maintain when she eats what she wants, even SOME of the time!

For many of us, excess calories even in maintenance mode means anything over 1200/day. That's why we need an 800-1000 calorie diet to even lose weight in the first place.

Hear me now. The struggle does not end once you get to goal. In many ways it gets harder. But the rewards are worth it.

Posted Sunday, Aug 30, 2009 5:15 PM by goalbysummer | 14 Comments [Edit Post]


Ann Taylor Loft and New York&Co!
So Ann Taylor Loft and New York&Co were the stores at which I purchased the goods. Three tops at Ann Taylor Loft, the end of summer clearance of clearance sale. All a beautiful green color. One in a Large, one in a Medium, and one in a Small Petite. All three for under $17.00.

New York & Co 4 pairs of pants and 1 top. 2 of the pants are crop Jeans in sizes 16 and 10, for the winter. 1 pair is a tan khaki-ish capri for next summer in a size 4. 1 Pair XL workout pants. 1 tan top XL also for working out. All approximately $10 a piece.

Total pull for the day=4 pairs pants, 4 tops. $70.00 total. All worthy additions to my goal closet.

I'm super excited to wear these gorgeous items. And it's only a matter of time.
Posted Sunday, Aug 30, 2009 12:50 AM by goalbysummer | 5 Comments [Edit Post]


Off To Ann Taylor's Loft and Banana Republic and to see District 9
Yes, I am off for an afternoon of fun and festivities. I intend to leave at 1:30, go to our nearest mall and peruse the sale racks at Ann Taylor's Loft and the Banana Republic. Possibly White House/Black Market also. These are my favorite stores. And if I find something STELLAR in a size 4 or 6P I will BUY IT!!! As long as it is super-cheap. And as long as I LOVE it. So what that I'm in a size 26 right now. So what. It's only a matter of time. And the act of purchasing something in a size I know I'm capable of in my adult life (like two short years ago, helloooooooooo), will be just another "monument" that I set up to the fact that I AM losing this weight.

Then I'll go see District 9.
Posted Saturday, Aug 29, 2009 3:52 PM by goalbysummer | 2 Comments [Edit Post]


Today is the most important day of the rest of my life.
As is every day from now on. But today especially. This is the day I have fallen off MF every time I've restarted in the last year and a half.

I look back at my past diaries and weight charts, and see that today is THE day. Why is it? Well, every time I restart, today is the day that I see no weight loss.

Day two, am weighing -5
Day three, am weighing -2
Day four, am weighing -1/2
Day five, am weighing - 1/4
Day six, am weighing - 0.

So, it is on the sixth day, the day I see zero weight loss, that my mind says "SEE!!!! It's not going to work!"

It's crazy to think that, because I know it is a FACT that Medifast DOES work, and not only that, but that Medifast works for ME.

So I am banishing these self-defeating thoughts, and I am staying ON program 100% and will drink ALL my water, and will motor on.

Why can't I just stay off the scale? I can't. The scale is my motivator. It truly is. If I can get a handle on not being so discouraged when I don't see a loss, then I feel I can continue to weigh every day.

So here goes.
Posted Friday, Aug 28, 2009 1:45 PM by goalbysummer | 7 Comments [Edit Post]


I May Not BE That Skinny Girl Who Can Eat Whatever She Wants, But I CAN Look Like Her.
Yes indeedie. I cannot wait for the day, granted in the future, when someone who has never met me says "I'll bet you can eat whatever you want and not gain weight, huh..."

What will I answer? Will I keep that little secret between me and the scale that I'm NOT that person, even though I may LOOK like that person?

I'll probably tell them..."Yes, I CAN eat whatever I want, but I choose not to because it WILL affect my weight."

You see, many people who look like they are that girl...well they really aren't. They have just made a lifetime of good choices. Sure, there are a few people in this world who have those kinds of metabolisms. But I don't know any of them myself. Every one of my friends or relations who has kept a trim physique has done it purposefully. Their decision making is second nature to them, though, so it never looks like a struggle from the outside. They just don't think twice about taking a second or even a first piece of pie. Their reason? "I'm not hungry". Or, "I had a big lunch, thanks!" Or..."I don't feel like it right now, thanks."

And their answers are accepted because it wasn't phrased as "I'm on a diet".

You'd never hear this in a restaurant:

Friend 1: Should we split a dessert? What do you want, Cheesecake or Chocolate Mousse?
Skinny Friend 2: No thanks, I don't feel like it. I'm stuffed from lunch.
Friend 1: Oh come on, just try a bite. I won't tell. It won't hurt you!

No, you wouldn't. But you probably HAVE heard this one:

Friend 1: Should we split a dessert? What do you want, a Neopolitan or Molten Chocolate Cake?
Dieting Friend 2: I really shouldn't, I'm trying to be good on my diet.
Friend 1: Oh come on, one taste isn't going to hurt you! I won't tell. It'll be fun.

SO.....I will become, in my mind, skinny friend and instead of saying "I'm dieting thanks" I will say "I'm really full from (lunch) or (dinner) and I really couldn't possibly." End of story. They understand that, even if you don't fully understand it...SAY IT. See what kind of response you get!

I will become that person. I AM now that person, my body just has to catch up with me.
Posted Thursday, Aug 27, 2009 4:04 PM by goalbysummer | 5 Comments [Edit Post]