My fat doesn't care how I feel, the only thing it responds to is what I put into my body. If I go through the motions of Medifast, no matter how I FEEL about it, I will lose weight. There is no such thing as "half-heartedly" as far as fat is concerned. In other words, I don't have to be gung-ho excited and elated every second of every day that I am doing Medifast. I can hate it one day. I can be angry the next. I can cry the third. I can feel a bit of joy that I'm not still in size 26 jeans, and then GET ON WITH IT. Get on with the business of losing weight, no matter how I FEEL. This is life.
I no longer find my worth in food. I've separated from it. I hope to never go back to finding my worth in food. So white fish every day and broiled asparagus is boring. I know that. I've seen "exciting" and "exciting" got me to 268....TWICE.
So every day I go about my boring MF routine. Some will say "mix it up, have fun with it, get some variety". No. I won't, because that is not the purpose I have assigned to food. Food is sitting in a corner. Food isn't going to have fun with me anymore. Food is grounded. Food is fuel. Plain and simple. And this much of it, and that much of that, all within MF guidelines, will get me where I want to go.
So I am on day 7 of my restoration to sanity, my abstinence from anything Off Plan. I humbly take the strength that God provides me each day to get through yet one more day. Simple. But not easy.
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