Sometimes life gets so humorous you
just need to blog about it because otherwise it seems unreal. Today
handed me just such a moment.
Today I had my pick of Montserrat or Maui.
Now
let me clear, no islands were visited or WILL be visited as a result of
what happened today, but I will set the scene for you so that you can
laugh and marvel at the irony, too.
Opening scene: Me, in
Sprouts Market, selecting my precious vegetables with care. Oblivious
to my surroundings. Until (Jaws music commence) I realize that a very
fit looking middle-aged man is standing right next to me, selecting (it
appears) similar vegetables to the vegetables I am selecting.
Said
very fit man strikes up a conversation about (upon retrospect, how
original LOL) the weather. Apparently it is a scorcher out there
today. I live in Arizona, so that is very believable, and, having just
BEEN outside in my car driving around with the temperature gauge reading
over 110, I can very well buy in to what he is saying.
I respond with "Yes, I agree! I have officially come to the point in the summer where I am DONE with the heat."
Innocent. Didn't sound like an invitation to me. Can you see I have a wedding ring on BTW?
"Well,
how does Maui sound? Or Montserrat? Would 3 weeks on an island with a
45 year old single guy like me be of any interest to you?"
I had a
bit of a heart attack right there among the organic cilantro. But I
didn't miss a beat (which is very surprising because I have not
experienced an invitation of this sort before....or at the very least
since the sweet man from Nairobi asked me to marry him on first sight in
Costco but that is a story for another time), and I said "Well, my
husband of 22 years would think that would be quite nice, as long as it
were HIM accompanying me, but I am flattered at the invitation!"
"Well, your husband is a da** lucky man".
Irony
I tell you. Irony. Because I can guarantee you that no fit or
otherwise 45 or otherwise year old ANYONE would have been inviting me to
a tropical paradise 3 years ago.
I tell you this story
because number one I am still chuckling. Number two, I have gotten to a
place where I am actually relatively comfortable in my skin. This did
not happen on my first journey. On my first journey to a healthy weight
I was completely unprepared for what I would look like once I GOT to a
healthy weight. I was completely unprepared for any extra attention
from the opposite sex, in fact it absolutely angered me. Why did it
anger me? Because I was UNCOMFORTABLE in my skin. I didn't KNOW how to
respond with grace or humor. I took every glance or double-take as a
personal affront, or worse yet, I MISTOOK it in somewhat of a paranoid
way, thinking my usual default of "there must be something WRONG with
me, they are STARING at me....." because THAT kind of attention I was
USED to having, being morbidly class IV Super Obese for much of my adult
married life.
This time I had warning. THIS time I realized
that if there is any physical beauty about me, it is God's
responsibility because I am certainly not responsible for the shape of
my nose, or my chin, or the color of my eyes, or my jawline, or my hair
color, or ANY of it. That part was God's doing. And I give Him credit
for it, and hope that I can use it in a manner that glorifies HIM. What
IS my responsibility is obedience, my obedience, my calling in life,
and I believe that He is doing a work in my life regarding my weight.
As a steward of this gift He has given me, this physical body, I feel
that I am called to be a healthy weight. I literally look at it as an
act of worship, or obedience, to Him who made me, to submit to my
physical limitations and live life at a healthy weight. Not only for
me, but for my family, to model health for my son (who needs to be a
healthy weight, so his Kidney Doctors have told us, in order to minimize
stress on his kidney transplant that he has had for 5 years now).
So
is it important to me to be healthy? YES. Does it matter to my family
that I am healthy? YES. It matters a great deal. Could be a matter
of life and death, not only for me but for my son.
Which is why
these encounters make me smile, shake my head, and think about the
irony of it all. Montserrat, huh? Maui? I am indeed flattered, but I
don't do all of this for random propositions from strangers in Sprouts.
I do it because it matters deeply to me to choose health. I do it
because I feel it is a calling on my life to be a lighthouse of sorts,
with all of my cracks, and a bulb that is sometimes obscured by fog, or
sometimes needs to be replaced when it burns out. I do this to show the
way for my son. I do this because sometimes we just need a little bit
of hope that we CAN GET THERE. If we do the work, put in the time, and
be patient. One Medifast Meal at a time. One Chapter of Dr. A's Habits
of Health at a time. One healthy decision at a time.
Rinse and Repeat.
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