How Can I Be So Sure I Won't Gain it Back?

Having "done Medifast" twice since 2006, one time gaining all 140 pounds back, and the second time maintaining for 18+ months, I feel like I can write down a few thoughts about how I can be so sure I won't gain it back.

Because, you see, I AM.  SO SURE.  I WILL NEVER.  GAIN IT BACK.  AGAIN.

The first time I did the plan, I was "doing a diet".  I was holding my breath.  Sure, I would have told you "I got this longterm!" but I was PETRIFIED inside that the moment I hit my "goal weight" that I would "do what I had always done" in the past, and start gaining it back.

I was petrified.  I was fearful.  I felt a sense of panic when I would think about "getting to goal".  I would scour and devour any advice I could on the topic, always thinking "yeah, that is fine for them, but what about me?"

My whole life I had never EVER been able to sustain and maintain any weight loss for more than a few months.  So what would be different THIS time? 

Well, the first time I "did Medifast" in 06/07 I see now that NOTHING was different.  I did not develop a fit and healthy mind in the process of "dieting".  I just put my nose to the grindstone, lifted the burden of following a plan, and had dreams of the day I would be "done with this thing".  And I was a great little dieter, believe you me.   If you go back on my blogs www.goalbysummer.blogspot.com to the early years, you will see how much muscle and passion and spit and fire and "just follow the plan already!" ideas I had.  I knew exactly how to follow the plan "100%" and I had very little compassion on those who couldn't seem to do that.  Because I could.  I was a perfectionist too.  All or nothing mindset.  So of course, I had to be "ON" all of the time, on task on purpose on fire on plan and I ran my little self all ragged and probably was one of the most DISLIKED person around ha ha because I was Miss Dieter.  Miss Expert.  You could almost say that my whole life I had always been the MOST SUCCESSFUL at LOSING WEIGHT.  I was a Professional Dieter and I was GOOD at it.

That MAY be part of the reason I had to gain it all back again, so I could once again feel successful losing it again, but that is probably a conversation for another day LOL.

To paraphrase Dr. A (in his book Dr. A's Habits of Health), I was stuck in an Oscillating Pattern of lose-gain-repent-repeat where my sole motivation for change was "I don't want to be fat anymore".  I was very focused on what I DIDN'T want, what I wanted OUT OF MY LIFE FOREVER.  I had gobs and gobs of negative goals.  (Things you want OUT of your life as result of your actions). 

I was stuck seeing food as the enemy, and my desire for it as "bad" (a moral choice).  When I was "off plan" I was "bad" and when I was "on plan" I was "good". 

I viewed my power to resist temptations as the all-important factor in my success.  And I viewed any lapse or fall as a failure, and consequently I viewed MYSELF as a failure when it would occur.  This is characteristic of a "diet" mentality.  I saw oozy cheezy yummy gooey decadent food as desirable but something I "couldn't" have.  One big deprivation.  Diet focused.  Food-centric.  Holding my breath.  But the one over-riding emotion was FEAR.

FEAR that I would wake up and all of my progress would be erased almost overnight.  FEAR that I couldn't safely give away all my bigger clothes because I'd probably have to pull them out again some day.  FEAR that I ultimately didn't have what it took to be successful in this area of my life.  FEAR that this time would be just like all the other times.  FEAR FEAR FEAR.

That was in 06/07. 

And I DID gain all my weight back.

Fast forward.  Now that I've painted you a picture of what was going through my mind the FIRST time I "did Medifast", I want to paint a very different picture for you.  I want to tell you how my journey in 2010-to-present feels. 

In July 2010 I made the command decision to pursue Optimal Health.  Notice, I didn't say "go on Medifast again". 

I knew that the definition of insanity is doing something over and over and expecting different results.  So, I was NOT going to do something over.  I was going to CREATE SOMETHING ENTIRELY NEW in my life.

Health.

Optimal Health.

Ultra Health.

Have I lost you?  I hope I haven't, because this is really SO key to understand. 

IF you make the DECISION to remain FOOD-CENTRIC and DIET-CENTRIC you will likely continue on in FEAR that you are going to gain everything back.

IF you make the DECISION to NOT BE ON A DIET and instead to use the Medifast 5&1 Plan as a tool to ATTAIN optimal health, IF you read and ADOPT DAILY Dr. A's Habits of Health, if you find supportive people who you can be accountable to in your journey in a community or one-on-one, if you DO THESE THINGS, then your journey, like mine, will be a hopeful one.

HOPE.  ANTICIPATION.  DESIRE to bring good things IN to my life.

See the difference?  This time my journey has a hallmark of HOPE.

Not shame, guilt, dread, deprivation, failure, all-or-nothing mindset, yummy nummy food that I can't have, etc etc etc.

Instead, I can describe this most recent journey as one of hope, optimism, the desire to create health in my own life, the desire to be my absolute best self that I can be, forgiveness, understanding, grace, self-love and acceptance, deciding who I want to BE and then doing what I need to DO in order to BE that person, getting up when I stumble, orienting myself towards health, adopting Habits of Health that I can practice daily and consistently over time to produce STUNNING results, staying accountable to those who care about my progress and want to see me succeed, etc etc etc.

And I know in my GUT and every other part of me that this is a permanent change.  I am not biting my fingernails waiting for the hammer to drop.  I have changed my mind.  And that was the hardest thing to change, but once I committed and surrendered to the process it wasn't hard anymore.  Seriously. 

Some things I DID change externally to help me make this change was:

*Turned off Food Network and Cooking Channel PERMANENTLY (we actually canceled our cable altogether).
*Stopped hanging out with the people who were not helpful to my journey.  Yes, some relationships did change, and some discontinued entirely because studies have shown that we tend to adopt the mindset and behaviors of the 5 people we spend the most time with.
*Said no to the "good" to say yes to the "great".  Meaning I raised my bar of expectations on myself.  I expected to stay on plan.  I didn't settle for "good enough", I began weighing my cooked proteins and counting my condiments because those are the things that would get me where I wanted to go, to optimal health.
*Read Dr. A's Habits of Health thoughtfully and intentionally every single day.
*Found one-on-one accountability through Take Shape For Life
*Stopped buying the "junk" for my house. 
*Bought a journal where I could begin to write out my POSITIVE goals, which were the awesome and good things I wanted to bring IN TO my life as a result of the process of getting healthy.

These are just some practical things that you can do to ready yourself to begin developing a fit and healthy mind.  Your action steps will look different than mine.  The doing is up to you.  A fit and healthy mind doesn't just "appear" the morning you hit your "goal weight" you must develop it intentionally over time like a muscle.

It will rock your world if you commit to making these changes.  Even if you have been in a "diet" mentality so far in your plan, you CAN begin to change over to being oriented towards health instead of viewing this as a "diet".  It is NEVER too late to become the person we 'might have' been!

Question is, are you ready?

Rinse and Repeat!