My Fat Called, Left Me a Message.....Read On...
Yes, it's true. My fat called me this morning. I wasn't available to answer the phone, but I pulled the following off the machine:
"Hey! I hear you are trying to get rid of me. Well, I'm not going without a fight. After all, I am a virtual storage-house for the emotions of the past 2 years. Remember when you were sad that your mom died? And instead of pushing through and processing the grief you ate it away? Well, that grief is stored up in your fat cells now. Remember your son's kidney transplant and the worry and pain and apprehension you began to feel...so you ate it away? Yup, that is stored in your fat cells too. And your miscarriage...where exactly do you think the heartache of that went? You stuffed it down with a Sprinkles Red Velvet Cupcake, and...you guessed it...it is stored in your fat cells. Even your fear of failure and your disappointment in yourself is tucked away in those layers of excess fat. Because you insulated yourself from your emotions by eating them away.
So now that you are planning on LOSING me? Just a word of warning, all those emotions are IN HERE. And as you LOSE me, stripping away the layers upon layers of emotion, they WILL come out. Sometimes they will seep out in ways you don't understand, giving you a general feeling of rage or sadness. Sometimes you will snap at your family because a bubble of emotion will make it's way to the surface. It will make it difficult, because the first thing you'll want to do is to relieve yourself of the unwanted emotions, by eating. It's what you've always done."
Wow was I surprised to hear from my fat in that way. But a take it as a warning AND a challenge. This isn't just about losing the weight. It is about dealing with life in a way that doesn't use food and the good feelings associated with eating food as a crutch. Because those emotions that we are eating away? They don't go away. They get stored. And as we lose the fat, they come out.
So we have to deal with them now or deal with them later. So here goes. I am prepared for the onslaught of emotion.
Posted Wednesday, Aug 26, 2009 11:09 AM by goalbysummer | 0 Comments [Edit Post]
1 comment:
Wow
That was very impactual for me as I have just reached the same point and realisation.
That I am trying to satisfy the emotional hunger with food and have been doing so for a long time.
Interesting that we are both reading Beck's book. The realisation is only half the battle
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