What Does Hubby Think about my Changes This Year?

What Does Hubby Think About My Changes This Year?

By popular demand (ok, one demand, this one's for you radiationgirlie!) I will blog about what my husband things about all my changes this year.

Well, we have been married 15+ years. He met me when I weighed 164, at Bible School. When we got married 2 years later I weighed 128. I then proceeded to gain about 10 lbs a year for every year we were married over the course of 14 years. Ouch.

He has always desired that I lose weight, but never really voiced it until recently. Ladies, I know your husbands love you, and they have probably told you it doesn't matter if you are overweight. They love you anyway. This is a true statement to a degree. They do love you anyway. But what I learned is that every husband desires an attractive spouse. To me, this means of normal weight. I had failed my hubby in that regard for 14 years. No More.

He has said many times he is so proud of me, and so proud of what I am accomplishing. He loves that I wear make-up again. Our intimate moments are more intimate now, if you know what I mean. He kisses me more. Hugs me more. Touches me more. And he enjoys it!

He does not mind it if other men look at me while we are out. It gives him a sense of pride, and I like to be able to provide that for him.

My outer beauty faded pretty quickly after we got married...I'd say about 2 years tops and I was obese. I looked twice my age. He has stuck with me through all of it. Now it's my time to shine for him, and I am happy to do it. He's earned it. I love him so very much!

He has not said a word about all the new clothes I've "had" to purchase. He likes that I enjoy dressing in style, as much as a rural Mom in Colorado can dress in style! He is thrilled. Need I say more?

Take care!

posted Wednesday, June 06, 2007 12:38 AM by goalbysummer | 10 Comments [Edit Post]

So Excited to Almost Be in the 140's!

So Excited to Almost be in the 140's!

I always get so impatient when I'm within about 3 pounds of dropping into another decade of poundage. You would think that after doing that 10 times already I'd be immune! But it never ceases to get me anxious in a good way, to break down below that next big number. This time, though, it's doubly exciting. It was exciting getting below 250, it was extra exciting getting below 200, and now after 3 more pounds, I will be getting below 150. I can't even tell you how good this feels! I'm doing it! No excuses, no prolonged failures, a few episodes of eating off plan but getting right back on, and just hard-headed committment. I told myself I would get to goal or die trying. Thankfully it's not the latter, I am getting to goal instead. Once I break into the 140's I'll have about 30 lbs more to go to goal. Then about 4 months of transition, and a lifetime of maintenance.

To any of you who are just starting, get ready to buy some new clothes. Savers is awesome, as is Ebay. Cheap, functional, good interrim clothes.

So that is what is keeping me up tonight. That and my two tall americano's from Starbucks that I've consumed in the last 4 hours. Yikes, I'll be staring at the ceiling in bed all night. Could I have not uttered the words "Decaf" at the beginning of my Starbucks Phrase? No. Not me.

Ok, I'm off...have a good night y'all.

posted Wednesday, June 06, 2007 12:31 AM by goalbysummer | 6 Comments [Edit Post]

Another 10K...Estes Park! And other rambings....

I was looking online for 10K's in Colorado over the summer, and low and behold I found one in Estes Park in two weeks! Fancy that! I live about 25 minutes away from Estes Park, so I'm gonna do it! This weekend I'll go up with the fam and they can do the Starbucks/RiverWalk thing while I take an hour or so and run around the lake. I want to see if the altitude (3,000 ft different from where I live) has any adverse effect on me before I enter the 10K. There is also a 5K if I feel like that would be better. But either way, I will do it. I feel such a difference in my fitness level by doing what I have! OK, on to the other ramblings....

I have solved my crunchy-munchy dilemma. I was craving something to crunch down on...so now I've taken to eating about 2 cups of raw brocolli for my green portion of the L&G. "Just raw brocolli? Can you stand to eat it without dip?" No. And I don't have to eat it without dip. I just take my 2 TBSP of low fat/low carb dressing and add water and lemon juice to it to "stretch it out". That way, it has a lighter consistency, and I still get all the flavor with about 1/4 cup of final product (dressing) to dip away in! I even have some left over! I love the Ken's Steakhouse Light Ranch and Light Blue Cheese. It's about 80 calories per 2 TBSP. I've started weighing the 2 TBSP out now, instead of doing it by the TBSP measure...I can cheat too much over the top of the TBSP and end up having way more than I should. My kitchen scale measures ounces, and decimals of pounds. So, if 31 grams of dressing is 80 calories, I "tare" the scale, put it on decimals of pounds setting, and then multiply .031 (kg) by 2.2, giving me .0682 lbs. So I pour out exactly that, or very close to that, and I know I'm not fudging on the numbers.

It's yummy.

I'm eating it now, which is why I'm rambling on about it.

Went to Costco today to see if they had size 2 polo jeans/capri's. Mind you, everyone, I am not even comfortably in a size 4 yet...but I can get them on...which means I go out and buy the size 2 for a "goal jean".

When I get there, I realize that Costco doesn't SELL size 2. They go from 4-14. I can remember when I couldn't fit into the 14's, not by a longshot! MF is so doable, people, it just takes a little time and effort. It just gets done. When you lose the momentum or emotional excitement that kept you motivated, don't worry. Just do the program anyway. Your fat cells can't tell how you feel, they are responding to what you DO. I remember many weeks on my weight loss journey that I was convinced I wasn't losing. I didn't FEEL like I was. Well, feelings are fleeting and emotions are fickle. But doing the work even when you don't "feel like it" will get you the results.

Have a great week, y'all!

posted Tuesday, June 05, 2007 4:43 PM by goalbysummer | 10 Comments [Edit Post]

Another 10K, Estes Park, and other Ramblings

Another 10K...Estes Park! And other rambings....

I was looking online for 10K's in Colorado over the summer, and low and behold I found one in Estes Park in two weeks! Fancy that! I live about 25 minutes away from Estes Park, so I'm gonna do it! This weekend I'll go up with the fam and they can do the Starbucks/RiverWalk thing while I take an hour or so and run around the lake. I want to see if the altitude (3,000 ft different from where I live) has any adverse effect on me before I enter the 10K. There is also a 5K if I feel like that would be better. But either way, I will do it. I feel such a difference in my fitness level by doing what I have! OK, on to the other ramblings....

I have solved my crunchy-munchy dilemma. I was craving something to crunch down on...so now I've taken to eating about 2 cups of raw brocolli for my green portion of the L&G. "Just raw brocolli? Can you stand to eat it without dip?" No. And I don't have to eat it without dip. I just take my 2 TBSP of low fat/low carb dressing and add water and lemon juice to it to "stretch it out". That way, it has a lighter consistency, and I still get all the flavor with about 1/4 cup of final product (dressing) to dip away in! I even have some left over! I love the Ken's Steakhouse Light Ranch and Light Blue Cheese. It's about 80 calories per 2 TBSP. I've started weighing the 2 TBSP out now, instead of doing it by the TBSP measure...I can cheat too much over the top of the TBSP and end up having way more than I should. My kitchen scale measures ounces, and decimals of pounds. So, if 31 grams of dressing is 80 calories, I "tare" the scale, put it on decimals of pounds setting, and then multiply .031 (kg) by 2.2, giving me .0682 lbs. So I pour out exactly that, or very close to that, and I know I'm not fudging on the numbers.

It's yummy.

I'm eating it now, which is why I'm rambling on about it.

Went to Costco today to see if they had size 2 polo jeans/capri's. Mind you, everyone, I am not even comfortably in a size 4 yet...but I can get them on...which means I go out and buy the size 2 for a "goal jean".

When I get there, I realize that Costco doesn't SELL size 2. They go from 4-14. I can remember when I couldn't fit into the 14's, not by a longshot! MF is so doable, people, it just takes a little time and effort. It just gets done. When you lose the momentum or emotional excitement that kept you motivated, don't worry. Just do the program anyway. Your fat cells can't tell how you feel, they are responding to what you DO. I remember many weeks on my weight loss journey that I was convinced I wasn't losing. I didn't FEEL like I was. Well, feelings are fleeting and emotions are fickle. But doing the work even when you don't "feel like it" will get you the results.

Have a great week, y'all!

posted Tuesday, June 05, 2007 4:43 PM by goalbysummer | 10 Comments [Edit Post]

A Good Weekend-June 4, 2007

Well, I had a good weekend with my folks. I stayed on MF for the most part, although I KNOW prosciutto ain't one of the L&G options. Oh well, ended up maintaining and hopefully will see a good loss in the next couple days.

The trip began after I touched down in Phoenix and went out to the curbside with my bag to await my father. I had just called him and he was about 3 minutes away, and I was waiting for him. I saw him drive up, and I could tell he was looking for me. I waived at him. He was still looking around. He was 20 feet away from me, 15 feet away from me, still craning his neck looking for me. You have to understand that there were only two people (including me!) waiting on the curb at that moment, and one was a 20-ish man in an army uniform. I waived. I waived again. I stepped out into the street and waived both arms wildly in the air. He was 10 feet away from me. Finally he stopped, rather abruptly. I got in and he said "I didn't even recognize you. Honest to goodness, I did NOT EVEN RECOGNIZE YOU."

He saw me about 5-6 weeks ago, and he doesn't recognize me now? I've only lost 10 more pounds since he saw me, but the change is rather dramatic, as I am down from a size 8 to a size 4 in that time. It's all the running.

My father does not give praise easily or lightly. He then said I looked like a movie star. OK, what alien came down and inhabited my father's body? Where is my REAL father? Game's up, I'm onto them! In all seriousness, though, I have to agree with him. I'm very pleased with my appearance these days and am thankful for what MF had to offer.

I've got about 30 lbs left, and then I'll be to my goal (or very close...about 5 lbs away...and I may revise my goal depending on how I feel when I get to 123).

So the trip started out well in that regard, but then he immediately told me that Mom had fallen that morning, and nobody was around. My sister found her 45 minutes later, crumpled in a heap sitting in her own urine. Her cancer doctor wanted her to go to the emergency room because of her history (she hit her head and neck, and has cancer of the bone in her head and neck...) but my dad and sister had been waiting to see if she had any increased pain. She had rested comfortably since then, and only looked like she got hit by a mack truck! But she said she wanted to go to the emergency room to get an x-ray and CT scan of her neck and head, so I took her. We were there for 7 hours, and they diagnosed her with a mild concussion and nothing worse. (Thankfully!) So ultimately my dad and sis were right, but why mess with those things?

For the two days I was there, I just spent time with her. I got her water, helped her eat, helped her get to the bathroom, and we did some practical things as well like go through all her shoes and get rid of the ones that she probably won't be wearing anymore. Her gait is rather unsteady because of the Parkinson's Symptoms she has from the radiated brain, so she has fallen 5 times in the last 6 months. No more heels, or slippy soles for her! They just moved houses to be closer to my sis and her 3 kids, so they had 3-4 boxes of bathroom junk. By bathroom junk, I mean half empty or mostly empty bottles of this and that, expired medicines, 4 deoderants a piece, 3-4 toothbrushes each, in various stages of disrepair. My mom is a "condiment buyer" and she is also a "lotions and remedies" buyer. Problem is she never USES the condiments (like flavored exotic oils, spreads, etc) or the lotions and remedies. Seriously, she had 5 large bottles of lotion that had hardly been used.

So, I went through that box with her too, and it was a bit painful for her to see her 8 sample size lipsticks from Revlon that were 10 years old be tossed out. I also threw out all of her other lipsticks, and promised her we would go out and buy her several brand new lipsticks in flattering colors. But some of these lipsticks I remember from 15 years ago, people! I think it actually felt good to her to lighten the load some, and start fresh.

So, I'm going back every third weekend to spend time with her and my dad. My DH is going to be Mr. Mom while I'm gone. He survived one weekend, he'll survive the rest.

I had coffee with a friend who is so sweet, and had lots of things to ask me about MF. She is amazed, and said if I don't ever lose another pound I am "perfect". I love her!

So, to reflect on where I've come is pretty staggering right now. I am a different person, yet I am the same person. I started at 266 at my highest, and now I'm 153. I started not being able to climb a flight of stairs without becoming winded, and now I run 10K's, and I run 2-3 miles a day. I started in a size 26 (tight) pants, and XXL tops. I now wear (depending on the cut/style/brand) anywhere between a size 4 to a size 8 jeans, and medium tops. I wear "youth large" or else "adult small" t-shirts. I'm stoked.

I noticed on this trip that I am garnering much more male attention than I've had in a lifetime. I used to be uncomfortable (when I was in my early 20's) with that kind of attention. Now I just smile to myself and consider it a milestone.

OK, time to go now. Have a great week....I'll report in on my weight loss for the week next week if not earlier.

Update: The Runner Died.

I know some of you were probably curious about what happened to the runner that I ran by at the Bolder Boulder 10K, the one who was having CPR performed on him. I heard in the news that he did in fact die. He was not able to be resusscitated (sp?) after he collapsed. It's very sad. He was 65 years old, and they said he had a large incision scar in his chest so he may have already had some kind of heart surgery in the past.

Thanks for your prayers. He was from Littleton.

posted Friday, June 01, 2007 2:22 PM by goalbysummer | 9 Comments [Edit Post]

My New Drink-June 1, 2007

Well, I have a new drink. I'm trying to wean myself off Diet Soda because it's been really fingered in the news lately as being super-bad for you. I believe it, I've always known it, but the evidence is so "in my face" now that I feel like I would be remiss in continuing to drink it. I told my husband I was quitting the bubbly, and he said "you'll probably live longer." He's right.

My new drink is, on the surface, rather disgusting. But I drank 3 glasses yesterday, and I've had one glass this morning, and I have to say I'm actually developing a bit of a tolerance, even a taste for it.

Here it is. 1/2 tsp Bragg (organic) Apple Cider Vinegar, 1 packet of splenda, lots of water (12 oz) and lots of ice. I've done research on Apple Cider Vinegar, and it appears to help with weight loss. One of my previous successful diets had you drinking 2 tsp of lemon juice every morning in hot or cold water, with a similar effect. The Japanese drink lemon juice quite regularly before or after meals, and you don't see the national obesity rate in Japan as high as it is here! In fact, Japan has one of the lowest obesity rates of the industrialized countries.

Anyway, there you have it, my new drink.

I'm off to Phoenix today, and my biggest temptation to overcome will be having a few drinks with friends. I'm planning on going out with an old friend tonight after my mom goes to sleep, and I always get in to trouble when I decide to have a drink. One drink leads to two, leads to me throwing the towel in completely for the weekend. I cannot have a repeat of the Easter week, when I went to Phoenix for 8 days and gained 17 lbs.

This will be a test of everything I stand for, everything I have desired for myself since starting this program. I have to look at the choice as such a poor one (having a drink) that I won't do it. It is imperative. I should print off my blog and take it with me for encouragement, and just read and re-read it. Yes. That is what I will do. Keep myself motivated that way.

I want to focus on my mom, and my dad, and not food or what sweet thing I can have next or when I can get to Trader Joes to buy the yummy chocolate-covered caramels. NO NO NO!

And I absolutely cannot have a gin and tonic on the plane. That will be a big decision point for me, no doubt. The temptation will be to just go ahead and order one, because I'm flying into a stressful situation and it would "take the edge off". But I can't. I need to let other things take the stress off...for example, I have some awesome Spearmint Essential Oil I bought at Whole Foods, and I've been adding a few drops to my bath water during the day. It has been very restful and relaxing. So perhaps I can take a bath this morning, and then take the Spearmint with me to add to the bath there. Sounds like a plan to me.

I think ultimately it is about finding coping mechanisms, and planning ahead. If I don't have a plan, and haven't formulated a coping mechanism or "escape strategy" I will feel cornered into a bad decision. It's funny how when we feel cornered into a bad decision we look for someone else or something else to blame, instead of taking responsibility for it ourselves. "They just had to bring that" "He just had to make that!" or "Why did they ask me if I wanted any, they KNOW I'm on a diet!" As if we are entitled to NOT be tempted. A good friend and mentor of mine once said "Victory is not the absence of temptation, victory is succeeding in the midst of the temptation." So, yes, I could put myself in a little white room in a little white straightjacket and never have another temptation! But what kind of life would that be, and what would that teach me? That my success is everyone else's responsibility? No no and no! I do this for me. I do this. I do. It is me doing the doing if that makes sense. That is the only way I will succeed in the long term.

Anyway, thanks for listening to my ramblings, if you've made it this far! Have a great weekend.